The Road to Righteousness Has Potholes Too
A life on the road of pursuing righteousness and the potholes that come along with it.
2 Corinthians 5:21
"God made him who had no sin to be sin for us so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."
I don't know what my perception of my faith is.
You may pick up on it through my writing, and if you know me in person, you'll quickly find out that I follow Christ.
I often think about Christ and want to follow Him as best as possible.
The road to righteousness has potholes, and the trip to paradise may not be as smooth as you think.
As of today, I'm not addicted to nicotine, alcohol, weed, or porn.
It took a lot of effort and self-awareness to overcome these leeches of addiction.
I didn't think I'd be here, especially not being addicted to porn.
As the story goes, I was exposed to the material when I was young, and then as I got older and was unsupervised on the internet, I found porn to be exciting and an escape from my stress.
As a teenager, I did not want to practice this dark side of my life.
It took years to finally be free of getting out of the habit of viewing porn.
I'll admit it, porn was the driving factor for my suicide attempt.
My addiction was getting worse because I started investing money into my secret lifestyle.
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop spending money on porn.
It was too intoxicating.
I survived my suicide attempt, and the doctors gave me medication to mitigate the ideations and voices in my head.
Invega is a dopamine inhibitor, and I theorize the medication helped me get out of my addiction to porn.
Chemically, I was less dependent on dopamine.
I think, but I'm not certain, the drug broke free my addiction to porn.
I need to consult with my Nurse Practitioner to see if my theory holds.
Regardless, I finally broke free from my cycle of viewing and practicing porn.
However, I do have potholes of lust that come up in my life.
Two to three times a month, I'll hit a pothole.
It was bumpy, but I managed to pass it and move along.
So that's that part of my life. Maybe too much information?
But I'm a guy, and I know most guys think between their legs rather than between their ears.
I made a vow not to pursue an intimate relationship with a woman or view them online if you know what I mean.
It's tough to keep the vow when I do have sexual desires.
I think God is proud of me because I am attempting to remain pure.
Like I said, it's tough, but not impossible.
As I keep riding on the road of righteousness, it will become easier to avoid the potholes rather than roll through them.
I'm currently in the process of losing weight and quitting smoking cigarettes.
I have cravings, but they are becoming less and less.
1 Timothy 6:11
"But you, man of God, flee from all this and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance, and gentleness."
My body and your body are temples, and we should treat it the best.
I have six years before I turn 40.
In the next six years, I want to be freed entirely from masturbation and porn because I have dabbled once or twice a month.
It's better than viewing every day; that was my life a few years ago.
I don't want to smoke cigarettes or smoke weed.
Weed is not a problem because every time I try to smoke it, I cough badly, and it's the worst experience.
It's not good to drink alcohol.
It deeply impacted my brain, and it's not good for me.
Plus, I take medication for my mood disorder, and it has the real effect of diluting the impact of the medication.
I want to be physically fit and strong in the next six years.
The key to achieving all my goals is to focus on a system of consistency.
Yesterday, I had a steak and cheese sub for lunch and a salad for dinner.
And today, I had a salad for lunch.
I'm going to walk a mile after writing this thought.
I will focus on the wins in my life and manifest myself at 180 lbs.
Even though I have been through some intense storms, I will not be the victim.
I'm choosing to be the captain of my ship and steer it in the direction I want to go.
Romans 6:13
"...offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness."
God calls us to pursue righteousness.
Philippians 3:9
"...not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God based on faith."
My ability to pursue and be an instrument of righteousness comes from my faith in Christ, who gives me the ability to do good.
If you're reading this and still stuck in the cycle—know this: freedom isn't for the perfect.
It's for the persistent. And righteousness isn't earned. It's received.
Keep walking. Keep seeking. Christ is with you, potholes and all.